somebody please show this to the relevant RYM mods:

Hello. I know that this request will likely be cast aside with a sigh and the thought that you've long ago dealt with me and it's presumptuous and aggravating that I should try to weasel my way back in, but I assure you I come with only the humblest of hearts and most transparent of intentions: I think I'm ready to be allowed to use RYM again. I was a jackass in the past and I may still have a little jackass in me, but I have made major strides in my quest to simply be a better person, I meditate every day and have experienced the first blooms of a spiritual awakening of sorts, which has melted away most of the animosity that once animated my spirit. My priorities are rapidly being rearranged. I've gained more than a modicum of self-discipline. All that to say that, as hesitant as you surely are at letting me have a voice on this website that I have so abused in the past, I really am a new, better being, and I swear that if I go afoul again, that will be the end for me. I'll never darken this url again.

Honestly, I've spent just as much time making custom charts and perusing lists in the  months I've been "gone" as I did when I was an honest member! It would just be nice to be able to interact more with the site again. I'm not requesting you republish my reviews or let me post on the forums - I have little interest in the former and none whatsoever in the latter, and even though I am ashamed to think of how flagrantly I abused the system for adding albums and artists, I'm not even asking directly that I get that privilege back either. I want to be able to rate music and make lists and I will be perpetually overjoyed if I am allowed to do so again.

I'd make a reference to second chances but I know that this is more like a seventh or eighth chance at least and I know that my request for reinstatement might meet with some displeasure but I've thought long and hard over this matter, and I promise that if you allow me to rate again, you won't regret it.

"What Does Fish Is..?" by Zapp Zapp has just been brought to my attention

and that's also a good album title, for the record.

the all-time greatest band name/album title combination is Yall So Stupid's "Van Full of Pakistans" like a van brimming with entire Pakistans. not Pakistanis, multiple entire Pakistans. it's a big van.

the best album title or band name and album cover combination is the sole eponymous album of that 70s free improv outfit Chamberpot, which is just a drawing of a hippo yawning.

and I was going to say the best a-side/b-side title combination for a single was Bessie Smith's "Gimme a Pig's Foot and a Bottle of Beer" b/w "Them's Graveyard Words" but apparently that single doesn't actually exist in this timeline. still, both of those are fucking fantabulous on their own, anyway.